r u l y

Men’s fashion operates on completely different rules than women’s fashion.  I am not sure I understand them completely and I have had to learn how to shop for my husband through a considerable amount of trial and error.

My husband is not really interested in fashion but his personal sense of style aligns perfectly with all the general advice you hear about dressing for the workplace.  What better person to advise us on closet staples for men!

My husband did not want to participate and claims he is not an expert in this area at all.  However, here are a few things I was able to drag out of him.

First, my husband has a built-in set of rules about what he will and will not wear.  Three of the rules I have learned over time are:

1)      It’s all about the small details. Men like my husband are very tuned into very small changes when it comes to clothes.  If my husband picks out a shirt, for example, I will say, “It’s nice but don’t you have one just like that?” He will then point out to me how some very small detail like the shade of color, the thread used in the stitching, whether it has a pocket or not, or some very small difference in the styling, makes it a completely different shirt.  I run afoul of this rule all the time when I pick something that, to my eye, looks almost identical to what he owns and likes and he will point out the difference and explain why he doesn’t like it.

2)      Brands matter. Once my husband latches on to a clothing brand he likes, he is a very devoted customer.  There are certain brands for certain things that my husband requires.  Even if another item of clothing looks identical, he won’t consider it if it is not the brand he wants.  Shoes are particularly brand driven.

3)      Technology is as important as fashion. My husband loves to have technology in his clothes.  He is often looking for clothes that are moisture-wicking, cushioning, or wrinkle-free, for example.

The professional man’s closet is a relatively simple set of items compared to the women’s closet.

A nice suit

Jos. A. Bank Signature 3-Button Jacket at amazon.com.

Every man needs at least one business suit, and most likely it needs to be dark grey or dark navy.  There is no denying that most men look their best in a formal suit.  There are few workplaces left where men wear a formal suit every day and generally suits are reserved for very important business occasions, such as meeting important clients (or clients that dress formally, such as those in legal, finance or the military) or making presentations to the public. My husband indicates a preference for a single breasted 2-piece suit with a 3-button jacket and flat front pants.  The bottom line here, however, is that you should choose a suit style that looks really good on you. A double-breasted jacket can have a slimming effect for some men and may be more appropriate.

Navy sportcoat

Ralph Lauren Mens Single Breasted 2 Button Navy Blue Wool Blazer Sport Coat Jacket at amazon.com.

A sportcoat is a great way to create a suit look when you have to meet with multiple clients on the same day who dress in a range of styles from informal to formal.  My husband prefers a navy sportcoat over khaki pants.

A Tie (or Two)

Geoffrey Beene Men's New Natte Tie at amazon.com.

I have been told by both my husband and numerous tie salespeople that I am terrible at picking out ties!  It is a good thing I don’t have to wear ties!  There is such a huge selection of clever ties and this is one area where a person could express some individuality.  It is really too bad that selecting a tie can be such a fashion minefield! I asked my husband for guidance and he said, “Don’t ask me . . . I hate ties!”  All I could get out of him is “No bow ties” and “No novelty prints . . . preferably solid color or stripes.” I hope someone will chime in on the comments and tell us how to pick out a classic tie.  All I can suggest is that you look at pictures of what high-powered politicians are wearing or ask a male salesperson for help in a good department store or menswear shop.  Many of the ties that we asked someone to pick for us in stores have tiny, repetitive prints but look primarily like a solid color from a distance. Unless your job requires wearing a tie every day, you can get away with as little as 1 or 2 ties.

The everyday outfit: dress pants and collared shirt

Collared shirts

Nautica Men's Solid Non Iron Dress Shirt at amazon.com.

You need at least one plain white collared dress shirt to wear with your suit.  My husband will never wear a plain white dress shirt without a jacket.  For shirts worn without a jacket, his “approved” colors are light blue, French blue, navy, black, brown, grey, burgundy, muted red, forest green, and olive green as well as stripes, plaids and checks in these same general colors.  He strongly prefers the no-iron variety since he does the bulk of the laundry in our house.

Nautica Men's Stripe Non Iron Dress Shirt with French Cuff at amazon.com.

Eddie Bauer Relaxed Fit Wrinkle Free Pinpoint Oxford Blues Pattern Shirt at amazon.com.

Undershirts

Calvin Klein Mens Body 3 Pack Slim Fit Short Sleeve Crew Neck Tee at amazon.com.

Beneath your collared shirt goes a round collar undershirt generally in a thick quality cotton.

Pants

Nautica Men's Sportswear True Khaki Flat Front Pant at amazon.com.	Until you buy a pair of men’s pants, you have no idea how many shades of khaki and tan there are!  Black, light tan and dark tan are the colors my husband says coordinate with the majority of his shirts.  He insists on flat front pants (no pleats) and prefers cuffed pants.  Again, no iron is his favorite.
Dockers Men's Signature Khaki D2 Straight Fit Flat Front Pant at amazon.com.	Dockers Men's Signature Khaki D1 Slim Fit Flat Front Pant at amazon.com.

Jewelry

Suunto X-Lander Wrist-Top Computer Watch with Altimeter, Barometer, Compass, and Chronograph at amazon.com.

The conservative look for the office is no jewelry except for a wedding ring and a watch.  While a lot of people have stopped wearing watches, finally here is one area where you can express a little personality!  A conservative looking watch that does something cool besides tell time is a great conversation piece.

Belt

Dockers Men's 30Mm Reversible Swivel Buckle Belt at amazon.com.

A simple brown or black belt that matches your shoes completes the standard outfit.  You could even be a true minimalist and get a reversible belt that is brown on one side and black on the other.

Socks and Shoes

Dockers Men's 3-Pack Performance Dress Flat Knit Socks Socks at amazon.com.	Black socks always.  A simple Oxford-style lace-up shoe in black or brown is always a classic look.  Keep them in good condition with no scuffs.  My husband likes the Ecco brand as he indicates they have some sort of cushioning in the shoe that makes them as comfortable as athletic shoes when you have to stand on your feet for long periods.
Ecco Men's Boston Plain Toe Oxford at amazon.com.	ECCO Men's Helsinki Lace-Up at amazon.com.

What would you add or subtract from this list?  What are your favorite menswear staples?  Please share in the comments.

When I first started working fresh out of college, I did not have a large clothing budget and was shocked at the price of suits. As a result, my early “suits” tended to be combinations of separate jackets, skirts and pants I found on sale. At the time this was a bit of a fashion risk but now you often see suits where the jacket and bottoms are in different colors or different materials. The trend has shifted in women’s professional wear to be less matchy-matchy and more separates that you can interchange with different items of clothing. This is great for women with limited closet space!

Dressing for work isn’t all that exciting.  There are so many restrictions on what you can wear that often dressing for work feels more like putting on a uniform that someone else chose rather than expressing your own fashion.

While I don’t claim to be a style maven, below are the items I wore the most often as a lawyer (and/or things I would wear now). These are the pieces that don’t go out of style and can be accented with trendy jewelry and accessories.

*Note: My picks include a lot of black. Black is a color you see a lot of in Washington and in New York as well as in a lot of fashion magazines. I have met quite a few people who find black unflattering and it can be harder for fairer skinned people to wear black close to the face without looking sickly and pale. Navy, gray or beige may be a good substitute in that case.

Suits

Evan Picone 2 Piece Blue Hues Skirt Suit at amazon.com.

One dark gray or dark blue knee-length skirted suit for interviewing

Other suits. If you work in a formal office where you must wear a suit every day, you will need at least 5 other suits. These can be either skirted suits or pantsuits. Suits in conservative colors where you can interchange tops and bottoms to create new looks will give you the most flexibility. Black, gray, navy and beige are general staples. Brown and olive green can work too. Classic prints like pinstripes or black and white houndstooth add interest. White or cream can work in summer.

Anne Klein Core VI 2 Piece Pant Suit at amazon.com.

Calvin Klein Skirt Suit at amazon.com.

Anne Klein Stretch Classic Fit Skirt Suit at amazon.com.

Jackets

AK Anne Klein Women's Classic Suit Jacket at amazon.com.

Black jacket – This is absolutely essential and you need at least one. An all-purpose black jacket that can be thrown over slacks, a dress or a skirt gives you endless possibilities. The most classic is a single breasted (i.e. one line of buttons) jacket with inconspicuous black buttons. You may be able to use one of your black suit jackets for this purpose.

BGSD Women's Heritage Three-Button Suede Leather Blazer - Misses & Petite at amazon.com.

Casual jacket. For those odd occasions where you need to look a little more formal than business casual but not as formal as a suit, a casual jacket can add polish. The casual jacket generally has the same cut as a formal jacket but is made out of a more casual material like cotton, linen or suede. You want the fabric to “read” as a casual and not a formal jacket. Again, if you keep the color neutral you will have more opportunities to mix and match in your wardrobe.

Dress Pants

Karen Kane Women's Jackie Wide Leg Pant at amazon.com.	Black dress pants – Black dress pants in a formal fabric like rayon, with a straight/wide leg type of style and a modern waistline somewhere between the hips and bellybutton are universally flattering. They can also be worn with millions of different tops from your jackets to sweater sets or blouses.
AK Anne Klein Women's Straight Leg Pant at amazon.com.	Beige dress pants – This is the female equivalent of men’s khakis. Cotton khaki pants can be unflattering and add bulk. A beige dress pant in a style similar to that described for the black dress pant will be worn again and again. If you can find good dress pants that are machine-washable, so much the better!

Skirts

Jones New York Women's Platinum Pencil Skirt at amazon.com.	Black short skirt – A knee-length rayon skirt in a standard suit-like cut with a mild slit offers a lot of possibilities. You might be able to borrow one of your skirt suits for this purpose. You can pair this with your black jacket for a suit-like look, with a collared shirt for a formal casual look or a sweater or blouse for a casual Friday look.
Mango Women's Skirt Japo at amazon.com.	Khaki short skirt – A knee-length khaki skirt will give you a lot of business casual options paired with a collared shirt or sweater.
Ladies Long Black Jersey Skirt- 8 colors available at amazon.com.	Black long skirt – A long skirt is especially nice in winter to keep your legs warm and as an alternative to pants.

Dresses

AK Anne Klein Women's Split Neck Shift Dress at amazon.com.

Black dress – You can’t go wrong with a black dress, preferably in a slender but not tight cut, knee-length in a rayon-like material. A short to elbow-length sleeve will give you the most possibilities. You can throw a jacket on top for a formal look, top it with a sweater or wear it solo with nice jewelry for a casual or cocktail party look.

Blouses

GUESS by Marciano Margo Bodysuit at amazon.com.

White collared blouse – Collared blouses provide a signal of authority and polish. Most women look odd with a menswear-styled blouse buttoned up to the collar. Look for a collared blouse with nice feminine styling around the neckline that could be set off by a simple necklace. A bodysuit style will keep that shirt from coming untucked.

Other collared blouses. You can get creative here and try out the latest colors and patterns to add interest to your suits and pants. French blue (a medium-shade of blue) is classic and generally flattering on most skin tones. Cream, pale pink, peach, light blue, light green, light yellow, and burgundy are other classic tones. Subtle stripes or checks could also work. Bright colors like red can be very fun but may look dated more quickly.

Women's Affinity open neck 3/4 sleeve shirt at amazon.com.

UltraClub Ladies Whisper Elite Twill Shirt. 8992 at amazon.com.

Chaus Women's Fine Stripe Shirt at amazon.com.

Sweaters

Women's Cardigan Twin Set Cashmere Sweater at amazon.com.

Sweater Set – A cardigan sweater with matching tank underneath in a neutral color like white, beige, cream, brown or navy is an easy, polished look.

Layering Pieces

Tank Tops or Short-Sleeve Blouses – I always found that women and men wore their suits and jackets quite differently. Men must wear a long-sleeve collared shirt under theirs. Women sometimes do but it really depends on the cut of the suit. Many women’s suit jackets are cut so tightly through the arms that it is uncomfortable (and/or unflattering) to wear a long sleeve shirt underneath. Hence, many women prefer a tank top or short-sleeve shirt, or sometimes nothing but underwear. Women don’t tend to take their suit jackets off as a result.

Tanks or other layering pieces can also be worn underneath your collared blouses to add color and interest to your casual outfits. White is the most wearable color for layering pieces and you should have at least 3 white layering pieces. Black is the second most wearable color and you should have at least 2 black layering pieces. The rest can be any trendy color that coordinates with your other wardrobe pieces and looks flattering on you.

AK Anne Klein Women's Basic Tank Top at amazon.com.

Ladies Purple Tank Top with Racerback, Cotton Spandex at amazon.com.

Kensie Girl Juniors Sleeveless Scoop Neck Tank at amazon.com.

Jewelry

Simple but interesting jewelry is the rule at the office.  For practicality, jewelry that won’t break your heart if it is lost or stolen is best.  You also don’t want to cause offense to your coworkers or clients by showing off expensive jewelry.

Kate Spade New York "Lady Marmalade" Clip On Earrings at amazon.com.	White Freshwater Cultured Pearl Necklace with Sterling Silver Clasp (9-10mm) , 18" at amazon.com.
Moonstone Round Necklace in 24 Karat Gold at amazon.com.	Citizen Women's Eco-Drive Silhouette Bangle Watch #EW9012-59D at amazon.com.

Hosiery

Calvin Klein Hosiery Active Sheer Pantyhose with Control Top (904N) at amazon.com.

Gold Toe Women's Micromodal Trouser 3 Pack at amazon.com.

I stick to two colors of hosiery: nude and black. The nude color should match your natural skin tone as closely as possible. I also try to keep at least one unopened pair of hose in my dresser drawer so that when there is an important meeting or event, I don’t have to worry about runs.

Shoes

I always feel the most polished wearing high heels so all of my work shoes tend to be heeled. For comfort, I look for a square toe or a wider toe box and if I can find a thicker heel, I will take it. I generally stick to black leather heels, brown leather heels and for the winter months, brown leather heeled boots.  If I take any fashion risks with my work outfits, it is generally in my shoe choice and I don’t go overboard.

Nine West Women's Lil Mary Jane Pump at amazon.com.

Nine West Women's Abalene Platform Pump at amazon.com.

FRYE Women's Miranda Slouch Boot at amazon.com.

So that is my basic professional wardrobe. Now it’s your turn! What would you add (or subtract) from my list? Please share in the comments.

The influx of 2011-2012 school papers has begun!

The school year has begun here and so has the inflow of paper and other school “stuff.” I still have a lot of catch-up filing to do associated with the school year. The paperwork isn’t necessarily academic-related either. For example, I need to update the personal health binders for all of us, particularly in light of all of those school checkup appointments. We need to de-junk the home office (again! . . . a never-ending process) and keep our calendars in sync to manage all the school, personal and business appointments that keep us all busy.

Below are some tips for organizing school papers and office supplies. While these tips are oriented toward younger school students, they really apply to all of us at any age. When we save school papers, we are essentially creating a scrapbook of accomplishments. It is a good idea for all of us to do this throughout our lives. If you are a working professional, it is a good idea to keep a running list of your major accomplishments each year and/or samples of your best work. If you ever need to update your resume or provide a performance review, you have your material at the ready. It is also a great way to keep up your self-esteem if your workplace does not routinely recognize your work. If you are not working, it can also be helpful to maintain a sort of life journal of things you are thinking about, books you read, uplifting letters you received, etc. We all get so busy and it is easy to forget the great things we have done or want to remember.

Tips for Controlling School Papers

You are either a packrat or a minimalist when it comes to school papers. Almost no one falls in the happy medium in the middle. You either have way too many papers and they are starting to clutter up your home or you throw almost everything away the second it comes home (or never bring it home in the first place). There are pluses and minuses to either strategy. It is important to recognize which one you are, though and think ahead about your long-term strategy.

Sentimentality for the Minimalist

If you are a minimalist, you just have to watch for signs that you are not causing hurt feelings in your children due to your streamlined philosophy. Your child may have put a lot of effort into a particular essay, drawing or science project and your tossing it into the trash sends the message that that effort was essentially “junk.” Your child may not care but if your child does, find a way to honor the effort without keeping the stuff. You could save one or two important projects and give them a place of honor in your home, such as on the fridge, on your child’s bedroom door, on a bulletin board, in a re-usable frame or on a shelf. You could photograph or scan important projects. You can re-use some work for wrapping paper, book covers, cards or other projects. You could keep a short journal or list of the projects. If you have a good memory, you could also remember to praise your child’s work to others. “Suze did an amazing collage the other day!” It is also a good idea to talk with your child about why you are throwing things away. “This is excellent work but we can’t keep all of it. We need to keep open space so you have room to create more things in the future.”

Filing for the Packrat

If you are a packrat, you need to create a filing system now to keep up with the paper as it flows in. Some people buy a large plastic bin and just toss all the papers and projects inside for the year. Others use file folders. I like to use a large binder with sheet protectors so that my children can easily review their work but I don’t have to punch holes in everything and the work stays clean. Oversize projects like mobiles and sculptures are kept for a time and then tossed unless there is something worth saving about them.

What makes a school paper worth saving? This is a really personal decision. I prefer to save things that show individuality. I give highest priority to original drawings, stories or ideas. Next are projects that look really cute but aren’t that original in that everyone in the class made the exact same thing. Last priority are routine worksheets or assignments that show knowledge of a concept but aren’t particularly memorable to me or my child.

Desk Organizing

Keeping an organized desk helps to boost productivity. When you start with a clear work surface, your mind opens to focus on the project at hand without the distraction of the 400 other unfinished projects you have to do. If nothing else, it is physically easier to sit down and start working. I am still working on my own desk organizing techniques. When you have a lot going on, it is hard to keep things from piling up. So, I look to others for help with organizing the desk and office space. Below are some tips from other organizing experts.

First, take a look at 3 home office makeovers from RealSimple here. One lesson learned from these makeovers is that you need a megaton of storage in your office space. A few shelves or file drawers are not going to cut it. These makeovers resulted in huge amounts of added storage, from wall-to-wall shelving to large entertainment/storage units.

If your office is struggling with clutter, take a look at your current furniture and storage space and imagine how you would double your storage space if you had to. What shelving, file cabinets, etc. would you add? Note that you don’t necessarily need to fill every inch of storage space that you have and you should discard things you aren’t using. However, also note that you don’t want to pack everything right next to each other either. You need a little breathing space between groupings.

Many home office makeovers I have seen make heavy use of decorative monochromatic file storage boxes stacked in a group on shelves. They look really pretty but I have never yet used this technique. If you are a proponent of this technique, you would have to get in the habit of taking works in progress and dumping them in a box (with a label, of course!) routinely. You would also need to remember to scan your boxes just as you would a set of file folder labels to see what needs doing or write these projects down on your master to do list.

Some more office tidying tips:

1. Your desk drawer. Real Simple’s version and their streamlined version of essential office supplies.

2. Pegboards. If you like pegboards for your tools in the garage, you might like them for your home office tools as well. Real Simple’s version and a small and large version from Martha Stewart.

3. Recycled Materials. Get organized without spending a lot of money. Real Simple gives tips for using steel cans and glass jars in the office to hold supplies.

4. Crafting Supplies. Martha Stewart’s clever design for organizing supplies like glue, paper, pens, pencils and other creative tools.

5. Quick-change labels. Another gem from Martha Stewart to use clothespins and index cards to label containers that are constantly changing contents.

6. Hiding cables and cords. If there is one thing that is universally aesthetically unpleasing in an office, it is hanging electrical and computer cords. Some people get really perfectionistic about how to wind up and label these cords. You could do something extensive, like this idea from Martha Stewart or something ingeniously simple, like this tip from Lauri Ward, to hide your cords with a sheet of painted foam core.

Do you have a tip for organizing school papers or the home office workspace? Please share in the comments.

“Happy Chairs.” Photograph by Lars Plougmann. From the Flickr Creative Commons.

If you are employed full-time outside of the home, your workplace may be more of a home to you than your house. While it is pretty standard that each spring we realize that our home life could use a little freshening up, rarely do we think about doing the same thing for our work life.

Sometimes, even when an employee wants to do a little “spring cleaning,” there simply isn’t time. Work responsibilities can be so overwhelming that it is hard to find time to eat lunch or use the restroom! If you manage to find time, you might bump up against office politics with your ideas for change or lack funding approval to make the changes you want.

A small change, however, can do a lot to boost your energy at work and stimulate your productivity and morale. What are some small, quick “spring cleaning” changes you might try at the office?

1. Bring a bottle of disinfecting solution (Lysol, bleach spray, etc.) or sanitizing wipes and wipe down your phone, keyboard, mouse, laptop, cell phone, door knob, drawer pulls, and other surfaces you are touching all the time. It will make the surfaces look “new” and feel like a small treat, plus it protects you from pesky springtime viruses.
2. An incredible amount of dust tends to accumulate in offices, particularly if you push a lot of paper. Dusting your desk is a really nice treat. If your desk is buried in paper, either dust around the piles or move them temporarily and put them back. If you are super-motivated, dust the other flat surfaces like the tops of bookcases, door frames and window sills.
3. Move some aspect of your office furniture or technology for a fresh change of perspective. You will be amazed at how something as simple as moving a computer monitor or telephone from one side of a desk to the other makes you react to your office a little differently and perks you up a bit.
4. Update personal photographs on your desk, walls or desktop image. I attended a book signing a few years back given by Cynthia Rowley and Ilene Rosenzweig for their “Swell” lifestyle books and one great tip they gave was to make sure that your office always had reminders in it of why you are working so hard.
5. Try to purge at least one recurring task from your to do list by thinking of someone else in your office who you could train to do it, a technological solution that lessens the amount of time needed for that task or a process change that eliminates the need for that task.
6. Experiment with a new time management or organizational technique. You might try Julie Morgenstern’s “Never Check E-mail in the Morning” approach and choose to work your first hour on pending projects or some of her other tips on to-do lists.   If you work with a lot of deadlines, you might set up a tickler file system.  You might download an iPhone app appropriate for your industry or set up Google Reader to track blogs you read regularly.
7. Stage an office yard sale/freecycle event encouraging people to declutter their offices. Collect donations and host a lunch party to let people “shop” from the collection. Donate or trash any unclaimed items.

For fun, below are great examples of real cubicles showing the amount of work and “stuff” the average office worker contends with.  I love how some of the occupants match creativity with business.

Have a great weekend!

There are few issues in a business office that involve as many politics as the shared office refrigerator.  Naturally, we treat lunches and snacks very personally and when we leave our food somewhere for safekeeping, we want to find it safe and fresh when we come back to it.  It brings a distinct sense of unease to find your sustenance moved, tampered with or otherwise disturbed.

The most common problems with the office refrigerator are overcrowding, stolen lunches, forgotten food left to rot and assigning responsibility to some unlucky soul to periodically clean out the office fridge–one of the most thankless and awful tasks.

Of course it also doesn’t help things that we are all bringing with us our own hangups about food and eating into the mix.  Dietary restrictions, food snobbery, calorie counting, secretive eating, allergies, cleanliness routines…you name it and someone in your office has an opinion on the matter.  The office itself may cause our eating behaviors to become more bizarre.  Once we are in a shared food environment, primal survival instincts are triggered and we become supremely intolerant and compulsive.  Or, some may be trying to put on a front of good eating habits to appear more conscious of nutrition and calories in an attempt to enhance their professional image.

If you need a lift for your Friday, try not to laugh as you read these true articles related to food in the office:

• Office refrigerator packs punch, stench sends seven to the hospital (CNN, May 13, 2009)
• The Half-Donut Bandit
• Popcorn Thursday
• “Smelly Food”
• Synagogue Fridge
• Diet Coke Jesus
• Elementary School Ice Cream Devil
• Disgruntled Fridge Cleanout Victim
• You Clean It!

So what can you do about the office fridge?  At the risk of creating a passive agressive note of my own, here are some Ruly suggestions.

1. Each person using the fridge should store lunch for only one day’s worth of food at a time.  Excess food will be considered open for sharing with the rest of the office.
2. At the end of the week (or day), everything in the fridge and freezer gets tossed and the fridge is cleaned.  The tossing should occur, however, well after working hours have concluded, preferably during the late evening or on a weekend.  You don’t want to toss dinner for someone working late.  Once employees learn that this policy is ruthlessly enforced, they will learn quickly to take care of their food or pack it in disposable containers they don’t mind losing.
3. Include cleaning of the office fridge in your company’s janitorial/housekeeping contract.  Avoid assigning this task to an employee who does not have janitorial responsbilities as part of their job description unless you really want to destroy their morale.  Alternatively, offer additional compensation for the person who “volunteers” to clean out the fridge.
4. If you have enough space, consider designating one space in the fridge for shared food and mark it with a colored shelf or label.  This is where you can put leftovers from meetings or extra portions from lunch.  Note that catered, perishable food should not be kept out for more than 2 hours from serving.  Put leftover catering in the shared spot in the fridge and leave a note on the kitchen counter rather than leaving it out.

Keep smiling and enjoy your fridge and your weekend!