r u l y

In November, the call came out from the local Red Cross office that at least 40 people were needed to make sure their Letters to Santa program benefiting needy children was successful this year.

One lesson about charity I have had to learn over the years is that when charities (or individuals) are in dire circumstances and sincerely need help the appeal is often made very subtly and in an understated way. You have to be listening and ready to step in when this type of call comes. If you are used to corporate pitches, where they hound you and hound you with multiple phone calls, emails and letters, and speak with exaggerated language, you won’t see that in charitable situations. The pitch is often so subtle or made in such a small way that it is easy to miss.

So, we stepped in, offering to help one child. The Letters to Santa program is extraordinarily well organized and has numerous rules to help make it run more smoothly. Among the guidelines they give to prospective Santas:

• Plan to spend between $100 – $175 but not more (if you can spend more, they wanted you to sponsor a second child rather than indulge one fully–probably to keep things fair amongst the children)
• No used stuff (except for some things like computer games)
• If you are buying a bike, you have to include a helmet.
• Wrap all items (or include gift wrap and ribbon so the family can wrap them)
• Try to honor the child’s requests.
• “You are this child’s only sponsor. What you purchase may well be all that they receive for the holidays.”

We were assigned a young girl, age 8 who wanted the following:

• a bike
• hair accessories
• clothes
• art/crafts
• games

The form also indicated that this girl was in need of a winter coat that we were expected to provide. I knew it was going to be an incredible challenge trying to find a bike, helmet and coat for $150, let alone all of the other stuff! But we did it, and I will show you how.

First, if I had this same list for one of my own daughters, the first way I would save money is to go used with the bicycle. And I can say this confidently because last year, I gave my then-3-year-old a bike for Christmas and we bought it used off of CraigsList for $25! We freshened it up with some new streamers and a zippered bike basket and it was good to go! Yes, the tires were a bit dinged and smudged, but she really didn’t notice and thought it was awesome. We saved about $40 this way. Good used kids bikes are all over CraigsList because they either sit in garages unused or the kids outgrow them too quickly.

My daughter's used (but new to her!) bike from last Christmas.

I often see the “no used stuff” restriction when it comes to charitable donations and it has always puzzled me. Why do these people object so much to used stuff? What if it is in really good condition? I have to chalk my puzzlement up to the fact that I have (fortunately) never been poor enough to know this circumstance.

I only began to understand when I read the book Below Stairs which is the terrific memoir of a 1920’s English kitchen maid that inspired the English dramas Upstairs Downstairs and Downton Abbey. Consider the contrast between the descriptions of two of her employers below:

Employer 1
“Talk about Christmas! When we got to the Christmas tree we deferentially accepted the parcels that were handed to us by the children and muttered, ‘Thank you, Master Charles, thank you, Miss Susan.’ Oh I hated it all. . . . The presents were always something useful; print dress lengths, aprons, black stockings, not silk, of course, they never gave you anything frivolous; black woolen stockings. How I longed for some of the things they had, silk underwear, perfume, jewellery, why couldn’t they have given us something like that? . . . So I hated this parade of Christmas goodwill, and the pretence that we also had a good time at Christmas.”

Employer 2
“They were the most thoughtful and kind people I’d ever met . . . . [T]he servant’s hall was an absolute revelation to me. This one was comfortably furnished and it had a colour scheme to it. We had comfortable armchairs, a carpet on the floor, a standard lamp, and other small lamps around, pictures and ornaments. Things that you could tell were bought specially for us, not cast-offs from their rooms. . . . Everything was done to make you feel that they really cared about you.”

–Margaret Powell, Below Stairs

Trying to keep the budget of $150 was a bit nerve-wracking to me. I stayed up late Thanksgiving Eve and ended up doing my shopping as my children and houseguests slept. Our Santa child was the first person I shopped for.

I found quickly that no one was beating Wal-Mart’s prices on bikes. Wal-Mart had a Black Friday in-store only deal on a 20” bike (the size I needed) for $39. You could add a helmet for just $8. I knew I had to have this deal to make the budget work. I was trying to figure out who we could nominate to brave Black Friday at Wal-Mart when all of a sudden the deal was available to purchase online! It was really one of those Christmas miracles. For $49.35 with tax, we had the bike and helmet but we also said goodbye to 1/3 of our budget!

Our $39 Black Friday bike deal!

The next major item to get was the coat. Wal-Mart came through on this too and we snagged an all-pink puffy coat for $19.84 with tax. For fun, we also added in a set of Lalaloopsy branded earmuffs and gloves to go with it for $10.39.

The pink puffy coat and the Lalaloopsy earmuffs my daughters covet.

I breathed a sigh of relief as I had the two most important items in hand. I now had roughly $70 to get everything else.

After watching Frontline’s Poor Kids documentary, I knew that basics like clothes were important. I picked up two outfits that I hoped the little girl would feel comfortable wearing to school. I knew my own girls would have no objections wearing them. The first outfit was a pair of jeans with a pink long-sleeve polo shirt; and the second a velour pants and sweatshirt set that came with a cute matching scarf. The clothes ate up about $25 of my budget. I added in a large package of socks for $9.34 since we are always hunting for socks around our house. I had about $36 left to spend.

The outfits and socks we found.

I went back to the little girl’s wishlist. She wanted hair accessories, arts/crafts and games.

After looking at several options, I decided to combine two of the desires and get her an arts and crafts kit to make your own hair accessories for $10.50.

Make your own barrette kit.

I also found a small travel-sized game that contained just marbles and holes but said it came with directions to play hundreds of different types of games in both 2D and 3D spatial orientations. The educator in me thought this would be a terrific challenge for her and would be easy to carry with her as well. $8.89 later it was ours.

The Lonpos Colorful Cabin 066 Brain Intelligence Game at amazon.com.

It was important to me as a homeschooling mom to get her an educational workbook as part of her gift. My kids do a lot of these. I’m pretty sure when she opens it she will groan and think “Geez, what kind of Santa is this?!” but I hope it will impress on her that education for her is absolutely critical. The Poor Kids documentary pointed out that children in dire economic circumstances are often shuttled from one school to the next as they move homes and sometimes are out of school for periods of time. I also hoped that the workbook might help give her something to keep her skills up. I found a thick workbook with reading and math concepts for the third grade for $10.61.

The Santa gift my recipient will likely be least enthused about.

That left me about $6.

I picked up some note cards and some Twistables crayons (for drawing or writing down flashcards for school).

The Red Cross instructions mentioned that we should include some “stocking stuffers.” Since we didn’t have a stocking, I extended our budget by making a stocking out of some spare fabric I had. My 7-year-old helped choose the fabrics and design, informing me that all good stockings have a pocket on the front (like hers does). I embroidered the girl’s name on the pocket with my sewing machine. There was something about adding in a homemade gift that made the whole gift feel a lot more personal and meaningful.

Our homemade stocking, complete with pocket.

To fill the stocking, we stopped by the dollar store to pick up silly string, pencils, a candy cane filled with M&M-like candies and some ring pops, along with a pink cat to peek out of the stocking pocket.

Stocking stuffers from the dollar store.

We also picked up some cute Santa-themed wrapping paper and ribbon to wrap up all the gifts.

Wrapped and ready!

In the end, our grand total was about $159. So, we went a smidge over budget but not too bad considering this was our first time participating in this exercise!

We bagged up our gift per the detailed instructions. Our donations were due by December 8th. We dropped it off to an energetic Red Cross volunteer dressed in reindeer antlers. At least 10 other bikes and gifts were arriving at the same time.

We didn’t get any feedback about how we did and we don’t get to see our recipient open her gifts but I hope we did OK and that we will make someone’s Christmas a little brighter. We will certainly be thinking of her.

How do you think we did? Would you have spent the $150 differently? Could you stick to a $150 budget for your own holiday shopping? Please share in the comments.

*Other than being a donor, I am not affiliated with the Red Cross Letters to Santa program. Other than being a very small shareholder, I am also not affiliated with Wal-Mart.

Walmart.com is doing such a ridiculous amount of business right now that it was impossible to check out! I encountered this error for over 12 hours until I finally got through. After seeing this warning so often, however, I have decided that it should appear automatically on my personal voicemails and emails at the moment. Don't we all need a "high volume" warning this time of year?

One of the main reasons I haven’t been blogging lately is because I have been shopping.  Family budgets are a bit better this year so the holiday present exchange rules have been expanded.  While this is certainly great news, it means that we have to spend more time picking out gifts.  On top of that, there are 6 Briggs birthdays to celebrate between Thanksgiving and New Years.  As a further challenge, we “adopted” a little girl for Christmas through the Red Cross and are purchasing all of her Christmas gifts as well.  So there is a LOT of shopping to be done.

If you are going to do this much shopping and not have it result in a miserable, financial mess, you have to be organized about it.  It has taken me many Christmases of experience to figure out the system that works for us.  Below are some of my tips.

1.  Work the spreadsheet.  The only way I feel comfortable with all this spending is to diligently track it.  In addition to the standard financial accounting we do in Quicken, I create a spreadsheet for each year’s holiday spending where I track EVERYTHING related to Christmas.  My spreadsheet is ridiculously detailed.  I break out spending by person so we can keep things “fair.”  I also put down any travel or holiday entertainment expenses, charitable donations, holiday card expenses, postage, etc.

2.  All shopping is holiday shopping.  We also count any “bargain” purchases as Christmas gifts.  For our tracking purposes, there is no “regular” shopping for anything but routine groceries during the holidays.  So if we stock up on socks because they are on sale, they get wrapped up for Christmas and tracked just like any other present.  If we pick up after-Christmas bargains, they get added in too or carried over to the next year’s spreadsheet.  If we are spending money because of the holidays, it’s in there.  We have one bottom line number that we keep our eye on for our total spending.

3.  Realize that you are really going to flex your savings willpower.  Getting through the holidays without going into debt takes a LOT of effort.  There is no simple way to say that you will only spend $x and not go over.  It just doesn’t happen.  But what you can do is work hard to keep those expenses as low as possible while still enjoying yourself.

4.  Bargains are everywhere.  For children’s toys, buying used is a huge savings and, yes, I have given my own children used stuff for Christmas (see last year), and they didn’t mind one bit.  I don’t have the energy to watch every Black Friday sale but I do watch for free shipping or __% off your entire purchase specials.  This year I did better than usual picking up bargains.

5.  The best “savings” are usually the things you don’t buy in the first place.  The best “bargains” I have made occurred when, rather than immediately clicking “Buy” on my shopping cart, I slept on it and realized that I could do without certain things to stay in budget.  I put back over $100  this way.

6.  Be careful about buying things for yourself while shopping for others.  The danger of being the primary shopper for a family is that you find so many great things to buy for yourself.  I am officially done shopping for me at this point.  I hope my willpower holds ‘til Christmas.

7.  Know your priority deadlines and focus on those.  If you are shopping for charity, the deadlines are usually in the first week of December.  If you want a very specific toy or item, buy it now while it is still in stock.  If you need to ship anything, get it sent by December 15 or so to avoid expedited shipping costs.  December 20 is the last day for first class mailing of letters and cards for Christmas arrival.  Photos or photo gifts need to be ordered as early as possible as well.  The only gifts that can wait are those that don’t have to be shipped and where the recipient is not picky and a generally appreciative person (don’t we all wish there were more of those people)!

How is your shopping coming along?  What are your shopping secrets?  Please share in the comments.

Bearing gifts for teacher on the last day of school.

This week was the end of the school year which means one of my top priority tasks was to organize thank you’s for my daughters teachers.

For this year’s teacher gifts, we went the entertaining route. I was a bit stumped for ideas but received a timely email from Pier1 Imports reminding me of their super-chic Tasting Party collection.

While realistically it might be hard for the average person to make little tiny hors d’ouevres to go on these beautiful serveware pieces, they will make even simple things like store-bought cookies or cut fruit look beautiful. We eat with our eyes “they” say.

If the teachers don’t cook or entertain they could also use them for:

• Bathroom caddy for toiletries like cotton balls, Q-tips and air fresheners
• Entryway caddy for spare change, cell phone charging, keys gloves and other pocket gear
• Stylish desk caddy for paper clips, tape, stapler, stamps, etc.
• Small craft supplies caddy for spools of ribbon, beads, stickers, etc.
• Modern Flower vase

Best of all, I got them for about the same tiny budget I spent last year.

I also saved a little time on the card this year without skimping on the style. Instead of hand glittering and gluing on a photo, I just used a pre-made photo card for teachers.

For this post, I blurred out the identifying info and faces to protect privacy (and yes, my daughter’s teachers are beautiful women). The card had the desired effect and the teachers really loved it, particularly my daughter’s hilarious expression.

Any other creative teacher gifts this year?  Can you think of another use for the serving dishes?  Please share in the comments.

P.S.  I have no affiliation with Pier 1 Imports.

One of Santa's many lists this year...

Cha-ching, cha-ching

Cash is hemorrhaging

I’m near the end of my shopping

My bank balance is dropping. . .

A sad but true rhyme of the holiday season.  For the past 24 hours, I have been shopping like a woman possessed.  Since we have to ship about 90% of our gifts, we have to hit the December 15 deadline to get everything in the mail in time.

Some people have trouble shopping for such a sustained length of time and prefer to break up their shopping into smaller segments throughout the year.  While it is not necessarily my preference to cram my shopping, there are a few advantages to this method:

1)      Overall, I am probably spending less time shopping than I would otherwise.  There is no agonizing for days or weeks over the right present or the best price.

2)      The continuous charges to the credit card in such a short period of time help keep us mindful of our spending and budget.  We hope this will encourage us to spend a little less.

3)      We are buying “in the moment” so we hope our gifts will have a better chance of hitting the mark with our recipients.

One thing I have been doing as I shop (and that I encourage you to do as well) is track my expenses on a simple spreadsheet.  My version goes a bit like this:

I add in all expenses for the holidays, from travel costs to event tickets to charitable donations and food costs.  I keep a running total as I go and it really helps me both to stay aware of how big a hole we are digging for ourselves and also to track whether I have something for everyone on my list.  As a parent, it is also helpful to look at the list and say, “OK, we have plenty for [child], no more!”  Each year, we can go back to prior year’s lists and see what our ballpark estimate is for total holiday expenses.

Aside from the budgeting and shopping management aspect, it is also helpful to look back at past year’s lists for gift ideas.  If a gift was a particular success or a spectacular dud, I try to make a note of that. I also create a separate tab in the spreadsheet to track gifts received from others.  We use that list to make sure we write our thank you notes/emails.  Since the type of gifts you give others often says a lot about yourself, the gift received list can also be a great source of gift ideas.  Sometimes I re-use old gift ideas for new recipients.  If you are going to spend the time shopping, you might as well leverage that information the best you can.

Finally, a list like this is a great way to preserve memories.  Suze Orman has been pointing out on her show that most people can’t remember a single present they received the prior year for Christmas.  With a list like this, you at least have a point of reference.  While we don’t particularly care to remember the gifts themselves, sometimes remembering the gift triggers other memories about shopping for said item or what family memory was created because of that gift.

How much does the average person spend for December holiday festivities?  I suspect most people don’t really know.  Here are some estimates from a variety of groups, which you can see range quite a bit.

American Research Group: $646

National Retail Federation: $704.18

Gallup: $712

Fool.com: $1,000

PR Newswire.co.uk: £713 (approximately $1,100)

 
For your own financial situation and peace of mind, however, you can’t rely on the “average.”  You need to face up to what you are really spending, whether it is far less or far more than the above estimates.  Unless you make the effort to track it yourself (whether using a spreadsheet, a software solution like Quicken or just by hand on a sheet of paper), chances are you are probably underestimating your holiday expenses.

You want to go into 2012 confident and ready, not hiding from your credit card statement.  Face the music now.  Don’t let worrying about money ruin your holiday but instead start working out a plan to pay off your holiday expenses now.  Could you eat at home the rest of December, carpool to save on gas, or reduce some other expenses?  Could you return some presents you don’t really need, buy used instead of new or stop shopping while you are still ahead?

Are you on track with your holiday expenses?  Could you add another stanza to my holiday spending poem?  Please share in the comments.

The end of the school year is upon most of us and that means it is also time to find teacher gifts! The teacher present is a bit challenging as most of us don’t know the teacher all that well personally and have to walk a fine line between giving a thoughtful and appreciated gift but not going overboard and embarrassing the teacher with an extravagant gift.

What are some ideas for teacher gifts?

Money

When I was doing some reading on Christmas presents a while back, one source mentioned that the tradition of Christmas presents for friends and neighbors began in large part when parents of schoolchildren gave money to the local school teacher at Christmas to help the teacher with living expenses.

With many school budgets being slashed and teacher wages frozen, I am sure many teachers still desire money as their first choice of present. One resourceful mom in my daughter’s preschool class organized a group Visa gift card from several parents. I once gave a creative teacher a gift card to Michael’s and she was very appreciative as she could use it to buy supplies she needed for the classroom.

If you aren’t comfortable giving money, however, what else might you give the teacher?

The Gift of Thanks

The gifts that have received the biggest teacher response have been homemade thank you cards. I have a very simple formula I use for mine.

First, at some point during the school year (preferably at a time when everyone is nicely dressed, such as a school program) take a picture of your child with his/her teacher. Print out the photo in 4”x6” (or smaller) size.

Fold a colorful piece of paper of your choosing in half lengthwise, and glue the photo to the front.

Run a line of glue that says “Thank you” and add glitter.

Write a nice message on the inside (or, have your child do it) and you are done! One year all I gave the teachers were cards and nothing else. I am sure for many teachers this is present enough.

Other Token Gifts

I suspect that most teacher presents fall into the “token gifts” category. Imagine if you were a teacher and received a ton of these every year. Last Christmas, I was absolutely shocked by the number of gifts the teachers received from parents. It was an entire table full! I have no idea what was in all of those presents but I imagine it must get overwhelming.

Unless if you know the teacher well and what he/she would like as a present, it is probably best to stick to consumables (i.e. things that can be used up quickly or can be easily given away to others who need them). The two most popular are probably food and bath and body products.

This year, I found a great sale at Bath & Body Works and created some cute teacher gift bags with a hand soap, body wash and lip balm. Thanks to a clever sales associate who steered me toward the clearance table, the entire gift cost less than $15, wrapping included!

Bath & Body Works is a great store for teacher gifts since the fragrances are unique and there is something for everyone. While their specialty is anti-bacterial hand soaps (which certainly come in useful for any teacher), after reading one too many cautions on triclosan (the active ingredient in antibacterial hand soaps), I have stopped using them in my household. Bath & Body Works’ selection of non-antibacterial hand soaps is far more limited (but still wonderful) but their shampoos, body wash and other products can be substituted instead.

Box Tops Reminder

Finally, a reminder that if your school collects them, now is a great time to gather up your supply of box tops and labels for education and drop them in the school office. While it may seem a small thing to clip these little 10 cent labels from various boxed and canned goods, the dollars add up over time, with $400 million paid out to schools since 1996! If you are wondering how much your school earns each year from box tops, the boxtops4education.com site allows you to look up your school.

Do you give teacher gifts? For all the teachers/school employees out there, what gifting guidelines would you pass along to parents? Please share in the comments.

As time winds down quickly before Christmas, I am going to share a few quick posts with some of my favorite holiday ideas.

First, I wanted to pause to remember that no matter how busy we all may feel, there are few people busier right now than the workers at package delivery services like the U.S. Post Office, UPS and FedEx.

Yesterday, the busiest mailing day of the year, we contributed to the estimated 800 million pieces of mail burden by dropping off our holiday cards. There was a huge line of people mailing packages.

Amazingly, some websites (including amazon.com) are still promising delivery before Christmas if you buy today! The U.S. Postal service will still take your packages today for delivery via priority mail.

Our mail was delivered well past 6 p.m. last night and our lovely mail carrier informed us that she has had no time to do her own Christmas preparations with her workload and expects to be called in for extra shifts this week. UPS was delivering late last night and another truck was back out early this morning.

If you are inclined to recognize the hard work of your delivery driver, CNN reports that U.S. Postal Service employees cannot receive cash but can receive a nominal gift valued $20 or less. UPS and FedEx drivers also are prohibited from accepting cash tips but can accept small token gifts. This thread on amazon.com suggests good gifts for delivery drivers include gift cards to a local restaurant or store, homemade goodies and food. Being nice and writing a quick note of thanks are other much appreciated gestures!

"Gift Giver." Photo by makelessnoise. From the Flickr Creative Commons.

Readers had so much fun with Ruly Ruth’s gift giving experiment post that my sister-in-law and guest blogger, Kristin Jolley, requested in a comment to join in the fun.  Per the old maxim, “Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it!”  Kristin’s wish wish was granted.  Below is my attempt to pick gifts for Kristin, who, in addition to being an incredible mom, also works full-time outside the home, and her honest reaction to them.  Will my gift-giving skills improve with practice?  Read on!

An inexpensive token gift from a coworker, neighbor or friend (~$15 or less)

Burt's Bees Hand Repair Kit at amazon.com.	Winter weather is rough on hands. Almost every woman can use a creamy, sweet-smelling hand lotion at this time of year.	Kristin says: I would LOVE this as a gift. The dry cold here in Utah takes its toll on my hands… they are dry-dry-dry most of the year. I can’t get enough of great lotions and moisturizers.
Calvin Klein Hosiery Matte Ultra-sheer Control Top Pantyhose at amazon.com.	Pantyhose are one of the staple items of every working professional woman. They run and shred so easily that you need a good supply on hand at home and in your desk drawer. When you have an important meeting or formal event, there is nothing like a pair of brand new hose to give you extra confidence.	Kristin says: LOL – this made me laugh! I actually avoid pantyhose like the plague. Pantsuits (and knee-highs) are my best friends and, when necessary (church, weddings, funerals, etc.), I try to get away with tights (winter) or bare skin (summer).
Jane Austen Ruined My Life at amazon.com.	For the ultimate Jane Austen fan–a fictional story of intrigue about a woman searching for the true Jane Austen.	Kristin says: This is a GREAT gift idea for me… so much so that I already own it! I love to escape to the world (or spin-off) of Jane Austen. This is a fun one.
Bracketron PHV-200-BL Grip-iT Mobile Device Holder at amazon.com.	An organizing tool for the car–an air-vent mounting bracket for your cell phone, GPS, iPod, etc.	Kristin says: At first I thought that I wouldn’t get much use out of a product like this, since I have a bluetooth headset for my cell phone with voice dialing, but on second consideration, I realized that I could really use this for my iPod! I don’t commute as far as I used to, but my son and I like to listen to fun music on the way to school, so we always have my iPod hooked up to our car’s stereo system. This would be a perfect addition for convenience.

A nice gift from a family member or close friend ($25-$50)

Isotoner Women's Stretch Leather Fleece Lined Glove at amazon.com.	A nice pair of leather gloves is a winter staple for the professional woman. It is often nice to have an extra pair to tuck into the pockets of each coat that you own or the glove compartment of your car so you never have to remember your gloves.	Kristin says: Another great pick for me, Anne. I asked for some “driving gloves” for Christmas last year and got… not QUITE what I wanted. This would be EXACTLY what I had in mind. Great choice.
The Music of John Williams: 40 Years of Film Music at amazon.com.	Some modern classical music to enlighten your commute to work or errands in the car.	Kristin says: While I do like John Williams (who doesn’t?!?), I don’t know how much I would listen to this, other than occasionally with my six-year-old in the car and that would be more for him than for me.
At Home: A Short History of Private Life (Unabridged audiobook) at amazon.com.	For someone in the process of building a home, a book about the history of home design from author/humorist Bill Bryson. Since reading time is limited, an audiobook format to listen to in the car.	Kristin says: While this sounds really interesting — and very intellectual — I don’t know when I would feel inclined to listen to it. When I have down-time, I like to escape completely, not think some more. I think my husband would really enjoy it, though. He loves Bill Bryson!

A luxury gift ($60+)

Coach Signature Kristin Op Art Swingpack Crossbody Messenger Bag Purse Turquoise at amazon.com.	A designer purse is a fun fashion trend for the professional woman and allows you to show a little personality aside from the standard business attire. Coach makes a purse called “Kristin” and I couldn’t resist. This would be a good small purse to take to a working lunch or meeting.	Kristin says: Very, very cute, but not practical enough for me, unfortunately! 8 1/2″ x 7″? It would only be appropriate for special occasions and I hate to transfer bags. In my purse I constantly have 2+ sets of glasses, iPod, cell phone, bluetooth, two sets of keys, Kleenex, lipstick, business cards… and those are just the basics! Let’s not forget about the random crayons and toy cars that usually wind up in my bag as well. Oh, yeah, and my laptop. I am more of a tote girl. This is the one I have had my eye on lately.
Shoulder Flex Massager (Grey) at amazon.com.	Nearly every woman carries a lot of stress in the shoulders and neck. This stress is amplified in working women who may spend hours hunched over keyboards and monitors. This massager would be a great way to relax after a long day.	Kristin says: Um, this is AWESOME. I totally want one of these! As a workaholic and migraine sufferer, I think I NEED one. This sounds like heaven on earth. Excellent gift for me, definitely!
Dale of Norway 125th Anniversary Sweater at amazon.com.	A beautiful Scandinavian sweater that could be dressed up with slacks for the office or down with jeans for the weekend. A great way to stay warm and still look stylish!	Kristin says: Beautiful sweater, but not really my color. I am most comfortable in darker colors (black, grey) and prefer clothes that blend with those basic colors. I don’t know how often I would wear this, other than Christmas day.

My gift-giving score

I’m improving a little but not much. Of the 10 gifts I selected, Kristin liked 4 and 6 were either things she already owned or didn’t want. 40% success.

I give up! What would you buy for yourself?

“I have been thinking and thinking… I don’t know! Whenever I think about what I would really like, it keeps coming back to time. Can I ask for that as a gift? I wish I had more time to spend with [my son], more time to read, more time to relax, more time to exercise, more time to think and BE. Right now I run around all day and just try to plow through everything as quickly as I can, usually sacrificing my time with [my son] and self-care.

Beyond that, I am so excited for our new house and have a million home furnishing ideas on my wish list. ”

Kristin

Through this whole gift-giving experiment, I find I am learning more about everyone by giving them fake gifts they give feedback on than giving them real gifts they all pretend to enjoy!

The gift of time! Yes! How simple! How true! If you could buy someone an extra hour in the day, an extra vacation day, a free week to do nothing but relax and get caught up on all the tasks that life requires, it would be a best seller year after year! Unfortunately, it is not for sale. “Can’t buy me love!” and “Can’t buy me time!” The best we can do is remember to appreciate each great moment as it happens and do our best to free ourselves of less important tasks or minimize tasks we don’t enjoy.

I hope you are enjoying these virtual gift giving experiments! In the next few days, I will attempt to present two from the male perspective.

Other virtual gift-giving posts: Ruly Ruth’s Holiday Gift Guide for Stylish, Sociable Women.

Christmas Presents. Photo by Mike_fleming. From the Flickr Creative Commons.

Shopping is a big part of the December holidays…particularly Christmas. As I wrote in my last post, now is the best time to be focusing on your holiday shopping, particularly if you are going to be shopping online or shipping gifts. There are a million gift guides out there but only one where you get Ruly Ruth’s honest reaction! What do you get the woman on your list who has everything? Let’s find out. I picked out several gifts for Ruly Ruth below. Will she like them? Read on!

An inexpensive token gift from a coworker, neighbor or friend (~$15 or less):

Godiva Holiday Chocolate Assortment Gift Box (9 pc). At amazon.com.	A small box of excellent chocolates! Enough to indulge but not so many that the recipient has to worry about her waistline.	Ruly Ruth says: I LOVE IT! But I’m trying to patronize smaller choclatiers like John & Kira’s. However at this price you’re not getting individual chocolates, but a chocolate bar.
Silpat Non-Stick Mat. At amazon.com.	One of Martha Stewart’s favorite baking tools, the Silpat nonstick cooking mat, for baking or rolling out bread dough.	Ruly Ruth says: I already own one! Not this exact brand, but this one of similar quality from Walmart and a slightly lesser price.
Clinique Gentle Waterproof Mascara Long-Wearing Lash Builder 11 Black. At amazon.com.	A nice quality Mascara. Since you are supposed to replace your mascara every 3-6 months due to possible bacteria growth, nearly every woman who wears makeup can use a new bottle from time to time.	Ruly Ruth says: You’re totally on track–but would prefer a curling mascara….or my favorite in a similar price range Maybelline Lash Stiletto™ Ultimate Length Washable Mascara.
Gunn's Golden Rules: Life's Little Lessons for Making It Work. At amazon.com	The always fashionable Tim Gunn of Project Runway fame has written a new book about his life philosophies.	Ruly Ruth says: I didn’t realize this book was even published–it’s now on my wishlist!! You nailed it!!
Bob's Your Uncle 8 Days-A-Week Mini Planner Journal. At amazon.com.	We’ll throw an organizing –friendly tool in here….a mini planner in a bright, fun color you could tuck into your purse.	Ruly Ruth says: Okay–my strongpoint is time management. (however I need a lot of help decorating and organizing!) But time and scheduling is my passion–I think I was born to do that. So if you’re like me—you already bought 2011 back in September b/c you were pre-scheduling school outages for spring break, etc. So in a sense, already have it. And love the look of this–but I prefer a whole column per day, vs. these half columns. AND–to be a great organizer–you can’t manage effectively more than 1 calendar. And I personally HATE the electronic organizers–I can’t draw arrows and other things I use to track appts. and items to schedule as easily. I like paper and pen/pencil! So the mini planner would be useless.

A nice gift from a family member or close friend ($25-$50)

Shape fx Side Laced Control Sheath Dress by Spiegel. At amazon.com.	For dressier occasions, a simple little black dress with tummy control.	Ruly Ruth says: Based on the review–no thanks. But just looking at it it looks very basic and versatile….but I probably wouldn’t buy it.
Beautiful Sterling Silver Love Knot Floating Heart. At amazon.com.	A simple necklace with a modern twist.	Ruly Ruth says: UGH! 3D necklace that won’t sit flat—not loving it. I guess you could say the movement is part of the allure, but I prefer this silver heart–which btw got 5 star rating vs. the 4 for the 3D version.
New York Parties: Private Views by Jamee Gregory. At amazon.com.	“New York Parties: Private Views offer an insider’s view of what makes a gathering unforgettable. It also shows how to cope with the unexpected.” ~Huffington Post	Ruly Ruth says: Oooohhhh…these are A-listers and not just celebrities—C-level professionals and their wives…LOVE IT!td>
The Tracy Anderson Method Dance Cardio Workout DVD. At amazon.com.	Get ahead on 2011 fitness resolutions with trainer to the stars Tracy Anderson.	Ruly Ruth says: I’ve seen this and was interested—however, we have a Wii and got Just Dance–LOVE IT!! So Just Dance 2 is on my list now.
Safco Mesh Desk Organizer with Two Horizontal and Six Upright Sections. At amazon.com.	Help your desk or kitchen stay paper-free with a good desk organizer.	Ruly Ruth says: I like it a lot—but I haven’t been so good at using these mesh organizers I already have–literally 2 horizontal and 2 small vertical are sitting in my closet. Staples® The Desk Apprentice™ Rotating Desk Organizer–this is my fave but it does take a lot of space.

A luxury gift ($60+)

Newport News Jeanology Wide Leg Femme Cargo Jumpsuit. At amazon.com.	A quick outfit to slip into for the mom on the go but with an elegant, casual look.	Ruly Ruth says: I love the outfit–but my stomach is not so flat right now And I don’t think I have the right fit for this right now…..
Amazon Kindle eBook reader.	“the most-wished-for, most-gifted, and has the most 5-star reviews of any product on Amazon.” Read anytime, anyplace, reduce your book clutter and buy eBooks at a discount from hard copy titles.	Ruly Ruth says: All of my friends have these—they love them! I have an extremely active 19 mo. old and barely have time for dishes and laundry and really no time for reading…but I’d say it’s a great gift for my demographic!
Canon PowerShot D10 12.1 MP Waterproof Digital Camera with 3x Optical Image Stabilized Zoom and 2.5-inch LCD. At amazon.com.	A waterproof camera to capture your kids in the pool, rainy baseball games or other wet events!	Ruly Ruth says: I would love this!! Shockproof to 4 feet!! Yes! My last fancy camera died b/c sand from the beach got into the very sensitive retractable lens.

My Score:

So how did I do? Of my 13 selections, Ruth liked just 4. Two selections were on the right track but not quite right. Sadly, 7 selections were “junk.” i.e. stuff she already owned or doesn’t want. A 31% success rate is not exactly encouraging.

I give up! What would you buy for yourself?

Chanel Coco Mademoiselle perfume. At amazon.com.	Chanel’s Coco Mademoiselle perfume is on Ruly Ruth’s list. She likes the deals on it right now at Nordstrom.
Le Creuset Enameled Cast-Iron Braiser. At amazon.com.	Ruth likes her cookware French too! This braiser is a bit expensive for an individual gift but would be a great group gift.
Nine West Women's Hobbs Boot. At amazon.com.	Over-the-knee boots are one of the biggest fashion trends right now. Ruth likes this one with the stiletto heel.
Rachel Roy Vest, Faux Fur with Belt. At amazon.com.	Another hot fashion trend of the moment…the faux fur vest! Ruth likes this one at Nordstrom the best.

I like Ruth’s choices!  I didn’t think of most of them because they are all in the “luxury” category and I was trying to come up with a range of affordable presents that are most commonly gifted this time of year.  I wonder how many of us are that way…what we really want is far too expensive for anyone to realistically gift to us.

Ruth also adds:

And just being with my family on Christmas and watching my kids’ faces! That’s the best gift in the entire world!!

XOXOXO,
Ruth

What do you think of these gift ideas?  Ladies, what would you add to the list?  Who is the most difficult person on your list to shop for?  Please share in the comments.